Grit - It's Not About Toughing It Out

The Real Nature of Grit: It’s Not About Toughing It Out

When people talk about grit, they often picture sheer determination, pushing through no matter what, and refusing to quit. It’s the “never give up” mantra we see in movies and motivational posters. While that’s a nice story, real grit in life and performance is a lot more complex. True grit isn’t about gritting your teeth and ignoring discomfort. It’s about being willing to feel the full range of emotions that come with pursuing something meaningful. That includes the fear, doubt, boredom, frustration, and uncertainty that naturally show up along the way. If you think about it, anyone can stay committed when things are going well. The test of grit comes when things feel heavy or uncomfortable. That’s when people often pull away, distract themselves, or try to wait until they “feel motivated again.” But grit isn’t about waiting for the right feeling. It’s about showing up anyway.

Willingness over willpower

We often confuse grit with willpower, but they’re different beasts. Willpower is about forcing yourself to push through in the short term, often by trying to control or avoid difficult feelings. Willingness is about opening the door to those feelings, letting them be there, and still taking the next step toward what matters to you. A big part of grit is noticing that your mind will hand you countless reasons to quit “I’m not good enough,” “This is pointless,” “It’s too hard”and learning to carry those thoughts with you rather than battling them. If you can move forward with those thoughts riding in the backseat, rather than steering the wheel, you create space for real persistence.

Values as your compass

Grit without direction is just stubbornness. The fuel for genuine persistence comes from being anchored in what truly matters to you. If you’re clear about the “why” behind your effort, you’re more able to endure the messy, unpredictable “how” of getting there.

When the storm hits, you don’t need perfect confidence or the absence of fear. You need a clear compass that keeps you moving in the direction you’ve chosen, even if the path is rocky.

The quiet truth

Real grit is quieter than we think. It’s not always heroic or Instagram-worthy. Sometimes it’s just making the training session when you’d rather stay in bed, having the hard conversation instead of avoiding it, or putting in the work when nobody’s watching.

If grit were about being unshakable, most of us would be out of the running. The truth is, it’s about showing up shaky, tired, and uncertain and doing what matters anyway.